"their own darkness" "their true nature"
"non existent" "their judging eyes" Constructia they're inseamna they are - ei sunt. Deci a lor e intotdeauna "their"
In plus spuneti e fara cratima.
E destul de ok, in afara de their ala, restul e bine structurat. Nu e tocmai original, nu sunt idei noi, dar e ok.